兩公婆

情人節2014

在香港,情人節如果堅決不吃堅決要你吃情人節套餐的餐廳而你又想出去吃的話,可以選擇的可能只剩麥當勞之類的快餐。

情人節於小情人是一年之始浪漫的重頭戲;於小夫妻是維持親密的節日;於懷了孩子的夫妻,就是最值得紀念且有意義的日子;有了孩子的,情人節就變成怎都可以都溫暖的全家節目;於有了兩個孩子再加一個在肚中的我,情人節只是餐牌上的點綴,讓服務生喊破喉嚨唱輪候號碼的罪魁。

這個情人節因為種種,我只想吃不預約不用被逼吃套餐但又美味且能滿足我奇怪craving的地方。我們去了梅林,週五晚上,等了30分鐘,不算太糟。最重要的是,還是只有我倆。不管怎樣,我個人覺得情人節應該只屬於兩個人的。

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最近的問號

最近。

A小姐喜歡尖叫;J大佬喜歡功夫。我喜歡網購;老公喜歡在家戴耳機。怎麼思量都覺得有點兒忽略和對不起這個最大的Baby。對於自己有時候莫名的脾氣,只關心小朋友,還不斷花錢的行為深刻反省。所以,老公喜歡做的所有事情(除了亂吃)都大力支持,希望這樣可以“補償”自己的過失。 

天生我才必有用,這句話不一定能夠套用在所有人身上。大部份的人都沒有那麼幸運,可以把自己所長和興趣融入自己的事業工作或日常生活。老公很有表演娛樂天份,但陰差陽錯,今日的他跟表演娛樂這行業沾不上邊。我平時觀察著,發覺這些得不到發揮的天份,偶爾會在一些場合漏出來,而那些發揮不了每天卻要面對的事情又變成千噸的壓力壓著他。生活本不完美,但有機會就要釋放這些壓抑,不然很不健康。所以,只要能讓他發揮所長的活動場合,我都非常支持鼓勵他去參與。

老公40歲生日時,喝得高興即席耍寶一番,很多朋友親戚都說,他的天份被埋沒了。我覺得,與其說是埋沒,不如說成被壓抑太久。不管甚麼原因都好,反正今天的生活已經是這樣。但抓到機會,就去咯!所以當朋友半開玩笑地說老公應該可以去做棟篤笑,我很贊成!去呀,去呀!試過了,就少一份遺憾。人生沒有多少次這樣的機遇。

之所以有這樣的感受,多少跟自己的際遇也有關吧?問自己,人生倒底為了甚麼?一羣孩子和一堆物質真能填滿那空洞?

你自己真的搞清楚了嗎?我,可是一直都還沒搞懂!

  

紀念日

結婚六年。感覺好像沒這麼久。還是有了孩子後,時間的速度感受倍增?

晚餐時,我們一開始的話題就是數一數這六年來的一月十九日在哪裏慶祝。

08年,當然是Four Seasons的大喜日子。

09年,第一年,回到結婚的Four Seasons,在Caprice晚餐。那時還記得要匆匆趕回去餵J10點半的那餐奶。

10年,第二年,一直討論著究竟是Pierre還是Petrus,後來我說我記得在Petrus的時候,你拿著一個很難看的公文袋裝著份禮物,所以一定是慶祝生日。因此,應該是Pierre。

11年,我們怎麼想也想不起是哪間摘星的法國餐廳,後來大家才如夢初醒,11年我們跟隨浣熊家出發去了澳洲。那晚,浣熊爸說,你們週年紀念,我們找間好些的餐廳吃。在一間類似義大利餐廳的地方,兩家六口一起慶祝。該算是難忘,但怎麼想了這麼久才想起?

12年,在spoon。當時懷著A,跟現在一樣像海洋公園偽裝逃出來的鯨魚,記得侍應還問我甚麼時候生。所以不難想起。

13年,最容易。五週年,二人世界去了巴黎,每天法國餐。最後那晚在Guy Savoy,我覺得很好,但老公第二天卻拉肚子,所以他對GS絕無好感。其實十九日正日當天,我們是分開過的。老公已經回港工作,我獨個兒跑去倫敦找朋友,逍遙自在。那天去了Borough Market,Notting Hill和Bicester Village的Outlet。堪稱史上最逍遙的紀念日。

正因為13年連續五日的法國餐馬拉松,我們回港後所有慶祝特殊日子都不再法國餐,平時就更不用說。所以算來,一年沒吃法國餐。不選法國,次選不是義大利就是日本。本人偏愛日本,猶其是懷孕以後,反而更加饞日本料理。所以今年生日和結婚紀念都選擇日本料理。

14年,是我們首次在101的高度慶祝,也是首次在香港慶祝而沒有選擇法國餐,更是首次不是由Mr Ann來安排。臨出發前,帶J去Nana爺爺家裏和表姐們晚餐,Nana輕聲問我,你們去哪裏?我在她耳邊說,ICC101。相信Ryu Gin這個名字對她來說,應該比較陌生。老爺就更不用說了。他只催促我們趕快去慶祝。J有表姐們陪伴,懶得理我們去哪裏。

每年結婚紀念日的另一個節目,便是重溫結婚當天的DVD。雖然聽來老土和無聊,其實當事人真的還是會看得津津有味。J猶其喜歡。他總說,我好想參加你們的婚禮。我也好想結婚!相信不久將來,妹妹也會加入陶醉行列。

轉眼六年。朋友說,你不覺得歷史會重複嗎?

Nana和爺爺,一個屬蛇,一個屬牛,相差四歲。生了三個孩子,男,女,男。

我和老公,一個屬蛇,一個屬牛,相差四歲。也將擁有三個孩子,男,女,男。

當看到他們在金婚派對的樣子,我也想像自己金婚的時候,哎呀,到時比他們還要老呀。我還站得直嗎?

有趣嗎?看著上一代,自己和下一代,你會發覺,生命有時候是一種看得見的輪迴。

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First long haul trip with both kids to San Francisco – 6

This morning, J was holding a map of SF wanted me to circle the places we have been to. So I sat down with him, in order to do so, I wrote a simple journal with him of what we did and where we’ve been to each day by looking at my iPhone snaps. He was very excited and said to me, “I’m going to show this map to my friends and teachers in school!"

Before bedtime, again, J said to daddy, “I’m very excited that we will be going home soon!"
He really does miss his home!

Home, do I miss it? Yes.
Will it be the same again after this trip? I asked myself.

J asked to sleep in big bed with me and Alyssa tonight. I said yes. When he lied down next to A, she started to scream and gesturing him back to the playpen. So I asked J to sleep on my other side, leaving me in the middle. I do like sleeping with both kids in bed, taking if it’s just once in a while as I can’t sleep well at all when they are in the same bed with me. Basically I only sleep well when I sleep alone.

Miss A has grown up a lot these days. I took both kids to the park downstairs in the afternoon as daddy needed to work. I saw big improvement in her when they were playing at the playground. It’s the third time we went there, she’s brave enough to climb up and explore more compare to the first two times that she’s only willing to do things with me together and would not let go my hand. She’s even willing to go down the slides with J (not with me!) and seemed happy! I’m very pleased to see the differences and wish I had an extra hand to film them down.

I also wonder if she’s already used to sleeping with me every night that it would be a terrible time for all of us when we need to sleep train her after back to HK. Maybe there are other alternatives? Maybe I can try putting her directly in J’s room and see how it goes? Maybe she would just be fine or drive J crazy because of her screams?

I reminded J that he will be back to his own bed and own room after we return to HK, but where will Alyssa sleep? Does she go back to her own room as well? J said, put her playpen in my room! She sleeps in my room!

“But what if she doesn’t want to sleep in her playpen anymore? She refused to sleep in it now!" I asked, “can she sleep in your big kid bed?"
“Sure! I’ll sleep in my big sofa bed." J replied.
“But what if she wants to sleep in your big sofa bed? Will you let her? Then you sleep in your own big kid bed?"

“But she may fall out of the sofa bed! There’s no railing around." J said.
“I can buy portable railing and put on both sides or even 3 sides." I said.

“Really? There’s such thing? Great, mommy! You remember to buy them when we are back in HK. OK?" J seems pretty positive and acceptive to the idea of sharing a room with A.

So the question is only how A will react. Should I try? Should I try the big kid bed? (Which is definitely too early for a less than 2 year old unless I’m ready for the sleepless nights that she would climb out of bed numerous times to look for us.)
So maybe I should put the playpen in J’s room?!

Also, what should I do when A asks me for candies on car rides when back in HK? What about asking me for iPad at home? Not willing to play with her toys instead? What should I do?

I’m pondering on questions like these while my lovely hubby who’s humming his choir songs in front of his laptop after finished his work stuffs. He has a competition in Indonesia right after our SF trip. I really want to film it down as I find it really hilarious.

Men, do come from a different planet. That’s why men and women are destined to be lonely, either together or separately. We have totally different things on mind although we are just few feet apart.

That’s why I enjoy talking to J more sometimes. He seems can be more qualified as a soulmate at this stage.

Miss A is very sweet, but sometimes really makes me mad. Yet, I still want to add, it’s a pleasant to have her on our trip. She’s unique, has her own characters. Sometimes too scary for anyone to touch or handle. Yet, we all love her. There are times that I want to yell at her, J would do naughty things to make her fuss. But after all, we all love her. Truly.

Oh one final note to myself, eat less but healthy when back to HK.

First long haul trip with both kids to San Francisco – 3

We’ve arrived San Francisco for exactly one week! It feels like just few days. Talked to hubby, we both agreed that we actually managed to cover quite a lot activities already: been to fisherman’s wharf, saw a WW2 submarine, close view of Golden Gate Bridge, California Academy of Sciences, tram & bus ride, cruise trip around San Francisco Bay, outlets, toys&rus, American style supermarket shopping – Safeway, and drive-thru macdonald’s! I think J has a pretty good idea of what a North American life style is now – mega big supermarket with big shopping cart, fast food restaurants offer drive-thru services and unlimited refill if you dine in, it’s always sunny with blue sky!!! But why it’s always cold in the morning? He asked me this morning. (Guess it’s typical California weather) Oh and he said, many parks and playgrounds!

Next, our plan is to cover aquarium, zoo and one more museum – haven’t decided which one. Maybe try to cross Golden Gate Bridge to Sausalito. And time to meet up with friends. Then we are pretty much done with our to-do-list.

Something unexpected happened last night, after a long day trip to Gilroy, A started a fever in the middle of night. She couldn’t sleep well and waking few times to cry and complain. We all ended up getting up early with sunrise. But she seems energetic, so trying to refrain myself from giving fever medicines, we got both Tylenol and Advil for infants, just in case. Meanwhile, just giving her more water and observe.

It’s really nice to wake up to blue sky and seeing the sunrise from one side, but we both agreed that North American life is still quite boring for adults like us. It’s wonderful to spend few weeks or a month for vacation here but settling for good is another thing. We couldn’t figure out what’s missing but it makes people lethargic for sure.

After long hours of shopping at Gilroy yesterday, we popped in Applebee’s (an American family restaurant that hubby says it’s like Tsui Wah in HK, although I doubt it) for quick dinner, then he said to me, I can’t imagine if we live here and all we do is outlet shopping every week! But imagine we gonna come back here 2-3 years later with 3 kids sitting around us in this restaurant! That would be quite a scene (to us, not to the people here)! Yes, 2-3 years later, probably. We can’t afford such long journey with 3 kids in a short future for sure, what life would be like with 3 kids? Here, is actually a good place to find answer, as it’s common to see family of 3 kids around. We are just generic here, not like super-special when back in HK. It looks not as hectic as I imagine or people here are well trained for large family? I don’t know.

Life, is an on-going journey that keeps coming up with questions and looking for answers.

生“飛滋”的燒豬

好一段時間,終於再來更新。這次,我不會說我很忙,事實是對於繼續寫有猶豫。為何猶豫也不必多解釋,重要的是猶豫過後,我還是回來了。

孩子的事先不說,他們的成長速度,是文字絕對趕不上記載的。今次說說另外一個“孩子” - 我的六呎baby。

老公很有喜感,他的喜感不是來自他刻意想搞笑的時候。他的幽默總是那麼出其不意。話說……

一個平凡晚上,我在沙發看電視,老公在另一邊對著電腦。黃金時段有一個常常看到的廣告,相信很多人會記得。

劉心悠 x fancl,那個健康飲品的廣告。正播著,老公對著電腦,發揮了他一心二用的本領,問我:這個廣告怎麼這麼矛盾?

我莫名其妙:啊?甚麼意思?我不覺得呀!

老公:不矛盾?她明明說,我要健康,我要“飛滋”哦!怎麼不矛盾?

我大笑,然後說:她說我要燒脂呀,老公!

老公呆了一呆,說:是呀,不是嗎?燒豬呀嘛!都是一樣矛盾的。想吃燒豬又怎會健康?

我,投降。

嚇人的客廁

搬了家。一切還在適應中。

這天,J要上他的廁所,因為被婆婆佔用。我帶他去飯廳旁的廁所。

J問:這是Aunty Rona(菲傭姐姐)的廁所嗎?

我答:不是。這是客廁。

J:甚麼是客廁?

我:當家裡來了親戚朋友探訪,他們是客人。客人用的廁所,就是客廁。

 

這時,爸爸在一邊經過,聽到媽咪說的後半段,突然“撲哧”笑了出來。還加句:媽咪就是愛搞笑。

我,摸不著頭腦。沒有呀?雖然平時我不太正經,但我剛才真的很認真解釋呀。

追著爸爸,要他解釋清楚。

他笑着說:你說客廁,就是用來嚇人的廁所呀嘛!怎麼不搞笑?

(……OK,回想,是我錯,廣東人說,人客,上海人說,客人。所以,我承認,我不是地道(道地?)的香港人。)

客廁,應該說,是人客用的廁所。(如果用粵語的話)

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J出生後,我都堅持跟他說粵語。爸爸說英文。

我覺得,到妹妹,可能需要改變下,我應該還是說國語好些。(粵語,畢竟不是我的母語。雖然剛被聯合國認定是language,而不再是dialect。)

 

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